I'll Stay For us
by shoppinglegends
Summary: SPOILER ALERT : DON'T READ IF YOU DON'T WANT TO KNOW ABOUT ANY OF THE FUTURE SPOILERS. STOP READING NOW. What I think would happen when I read the next Stendan scene spoiler. The one where Ste asks Brendan to ask him to stay.


**SPOILERS. IF YOU HAVE NOT READ THE UPCOMING STENDAN SPOILERS (ANYTHING AFTER THE 1ST DECEMBER 2012) AND IF YOU DO NOT WANT TO KNOW WHAT WILL HAPPEN. DO NOT READ.**

**HERE'S YOUR CHANCE TO LEAVE...**

**I MEAN IT...**

**GO...**

**So for all of you who are still left you've probably been crying like a baby like I was hearing the spoiler about the punch. *heart stops* I was having a panic attack and so angry at everything. **

**However more spoilers came out that Doug gives Ste a ticket to Dublin. (Yay Doug! I now like you!) So that's made me a bit more excited but still not happy with the punch although we'll see how that plays out.**

**So this is my version of what I think will happen in this scene.**

**Hope you enjoy! Please read review favourite and follow!**

**p.s. Once again I wrote this in a hurry so sorry about the mistakes or whatever in this.**

* * *

'Come with me. To America. There's nothing left for us here. We can start a new life. Just you and me.'

Doug had said.

That was all that was running through Ste's mind.

That and the fact that he was stood outside Chez Chez. Too afraid to go in. Afraid of what words might be exchanged inside that building.

Afraid of rejection.

Dissapointment.

Hurt.

The gold band on his ring finger was screaming at him to turn around and run. Run away from this village, run away from the financial problems with the deli, run away from his past, run away from him.

And yet Ste found himself taking those careful steps up the stairs again, creating a creak with each step as flashbacks of the first time came quickly in his mind.

_'I just wanted to protect you Steven.'_

He had begged. Brendan had begged and begged. But now it was Ste's turn. He was determined.

Arriving on the top floor, Ste stared at the man sitting at the bar, glass in hand.

'What do you want Steven?' Brendan said without turning around.

'We need to talk.' Ste said, his voice shaking.

'Thought that's what we were doing? You going to spit out what you want to say or do I have to guess?' Brendan replied, still with his back turned.

'Doug asked me to move to America with him.' Ste whispered.

Brendan dropped his head as he felt his heart drop. He slowly lifted his head up and turned it further away from Ste to prevent any of the already forming tears from falling.

Forcing a smile, Brendan cleared his throat and said 'Well, congratulations I guess. Safe flight and all.' Giving Ste a wave dismissing him.

'Brendan...' Ste whispered.

'I think you should leave.' Brendan said as he composed himself and got up to walk towards the office.

Ste quickly stood in front of him and blocked his path and put his hand on Brendan's chest.

'Please...' Ste begged.

'Take your hand off me.' Brendan hissed.

'Please...' Ste begged again.

'What do you want from me Steven huh?' Brendan asked, glaring at Ste. 'Do you want me to jump up and down out of excitement for you, serve you champagne and throw you a leaving party? Well you have Cheryl for that.'

'I want you...' Ste said shakily.

Brendan sighed as he dropped his head again looking at the floor.

Taking a deep breath, frowning and raising his hand to rub his forehead, with all his strength he said. 'You don't mean that. You're confused. You're just scared to leave Hollyoaks. It's been your home for so many years. That's all. You don't want this. You don't want me.'

'Don't do that.' Ste said, frustrated. 'Don't keep pushing me away.'

'I'm just saying what's true.'

'You don't know what's true. You're not me. I am. I know how I feel and I want you.'

'So what? You're throwing away a perfectly good life? Someone who can give you everything you've ever wanted for someone who could never give you anything you want?'

'But you've changed!' Ste said.

'I'm still not the man you want me to be, Steven. And I never will be.'

'But you saved me. From a bullet. That has to mean something!'

'It means that I was stupid enough to stand in front of a gun. It means I was stupid enough to have gotten people in my life in trouble. And I'm sorry about that. But apart from that, it didn't mean anything.'

'Don't you dare deny that.' Ste shouted angrily. 'You knew we had something! You knew we meant something. You and I. We meant everything to you so don't you dare lie.'

'You've got it all wrong. You...you were just someone who didn't fall under my spell straight away so I played you. Like every other guy I have managed to get. You're just another one of my 'achievements'. You meant NOTHING.'

As Brendan emphasised the last word and before he could finish, Ste had slapped him right across the face.

They both stood still as the club echoed with the sound of the slap.

'GOD! I'm stupid!' Ste said as he walked away from Brendan, running his hands through his hair.

'Why can't I see what everyone else sees? Why can't I just hate you like everyone does? Even your sister, your own family told me to stay away from me. But no! Ste has to go listen to his heart. His stupid heart.'

Ste said as he leaned against the bar and broke down crying.

_Don't do it. Brendan thought to himself. Don't._

But before you know it, Brendan had closed the gap between them and was pulling the boy into his arms, holding him to try and ease the pain.

As Ste held on for dear life, he felt Brendan pull away from him and holding on to the back of Ste's head, Brendan placed their foreheads together.

Breathing heavily, both men just stood there and let the minutes pass.

_I need this._ Brendan thought trying to convince himself and God that this wasn't breaking his deal. _If I'm never going to see him again. I need this. Just a minute with him. Just one more._

'Ask me to stay. Just say it. And I'll stay. For us.' Ste whispered.

Brendan slowly shook his head. 'Don't. Don't ask me to do that.'

Ste opened his eyes, he saw Brendan had his eyes screwed shut. Deciding it was the perfect moment, Ste leaned in, closing the gap between him and Brendan.

As their lips united in a kiss, everything slowed down for Ste. He finally knew what he wanted. He finally went for it. He was in his heaven.

But fate was not ready to give him his fairytale ending.

Not yet.

As Brendan pulled away, he whispered. 'I'm sorry.' as he looked up into Ste's eyes, his own filled with tears.

'For what?' Ste questioned.

Brendan continued to stare straight into Ste's eyes for one more second and by the next, the sadness had gone and emptiness had taken its place.

He shoved Ste away from him and raising his left hand, he repeated the actions known oh too well by these two.

Ste collapsed onto the floor, gasping and held his face as he trembled.

Unable to form words, Ste just sat broken on the floor, shaking his head as tears streamed down his face.

In that one millisecond. Brendan had broken everything he had tried so hard to fix.

He broke Ste's heart. He threw away any chances he had of getting Ste back. And worst of all?

He killed himself in the process.

That punch. That one single motion that hurt the love of his life...yeah it didn't just kill him. It butchered and tortured his heart and soul.

As soon as the actions were done, Brendan snapped out of it. Seeing his boy crumpled on the floor like this. No. No. NO!

He quickly ran to Ste and was beside him in a millisecond but it was no good.

The boy winced as he shied away from him.

'Don't' was whispered and along with a couple of whimpers and grunts of frustration, the boy was gone.

Gone.

For good.

Brendan fell to the floor as he pulled his legs up and curled himself up in a ball as he rocked back and forth eyes blank tears streaming down as the hate for himself grew more and more.

* * *

**I hope you liked this. I hope you cried like I did writing this. Please review favourite or follow :) Thank you!**


End file.
